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Stop touching your customers

Posted by Michael Bloch in web marketing (Monday March 7, 2011 )

Dang, I hate some of the jargon that pops up in marketing. I’ve added “touching” to the must-die list.

I’ve heard the term “touching” popping up a little too frequently recently.

We do not touch customers – touching your customers is probably illegal in many countries. It can be really offensive if you haven’t washed your hands.

Nor do we interface with them – they aren’t machines.

We contact, communicate and maybe even connect with (even that’s a bit ugh) – we even “stay in touch”. But we do not just “touch” ..ever.. hands off.

Why must we find new words when totally acceptable and functional words are already in place? What purpose does the term “touch” really serve? Do we expect our customers to call up and say, “You touched me earlier today.”

Another example of shocking online marketing jargon that thankfully pretty much died out was “eyeballs”.. meaning web site visitors, or even just “visitors”.

Whenever someone would mention it, I would immediately think of eyeballs floating in front of a screen. They would be dripping with blood as well, which is understandable given I’m a Stephen King fan. I half expected him to write a book based on the concept.

I haven’t been immune to using inappropriate jargon. I seem to remember using “best of breed” a few times and I wasn’t selling dogs. Brrr.

Please, don’t touch your customers. Let’s kill that term before it has too much of a chance to take hold and gains a life of its own. Mr. King, if you’re reading this, take the idea and run with it – I’m thinking a story of a marketer who has the power to turn everyone he touches into zombies – contact me (yes, contact), let’s chat (not interface) about it.

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